just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Randomize
