she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
