I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
