every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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