Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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