Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
