I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Send help, water and tortillas.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
