ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Randomize
