Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize
