im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
you made out with another girl for some wings
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
