i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Pooping to opera.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
