the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
