That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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