You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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