David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize