You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Randomize
