We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
