Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(389): View more from

So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"

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(404): View more from Georgia

They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.

(618): View more from Illinois

Disappointment?

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?

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(985): View more from Louisiana

Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?

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(310): View more from California

Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.

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(925): View more from California

crossed #23 off the Slucket List!

(1-925): View more from California

YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.

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(330): View more from Ohio

That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...

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(870): View more from Arkansas

I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.

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