My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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