420 ftw
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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