I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
