they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
