Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize