Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
