I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize
