i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
