It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
