Please don't use social media to get back at me.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize
