party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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