return my video game
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Randomize