i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Randomize
