girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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