she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
