is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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