Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
