I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Randomize