Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
He kissed a someone with a penis
home. puking in laundry basket.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Randomize
