I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
