PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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