Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
