Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
