Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
