Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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