This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
