You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
