hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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