just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize