How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
you told grandpa to call you daddy
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
i think my cat just said my name.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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