? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
