belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
