is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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