i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize